Thursday, June 17, 2010

Change

Everything is changing. Not so much me but everything around me.

Usually life has always seemed so steady. Nothing has changed drastically. Friends have always been there. Siblings have always been there for family dinners or church on Sunday. Summer has always involved being outside, swimming at the lake with friends, camping and sun bathing.

But now, everyone is moving on and growing up. If I turn my head one way, people are getting engaged. Turn it the other way and people are moving. Turn it just a little bit more and you’ve got pregnancies.

And here I am, still standing where I always have. Everyone seems to have taken the step across the threshold of adulthood. I haven’t quite mustered the courage.

I still feel like the 10 year old girl who climbed trees and played house with my sister. I daydream about being a superhero. I’d love to have Indiana Jones’ job. Seriously. I secretly believe there is more to this world than what we can really see.

But reality awaits.

My sister is getting married in August and then will be moving to Mississippi to live with her new husband. From there, who knows where he will get stationed. Across the United States? Europe? Who knows?

I can tell you I am trying to thoroughly enjoy every moment I have with her up until her wedding and the inevitable move. She’s just always been home with my parents (except the school year she spent in Wayne). I can count on seeing her every weekend. But she’s growing up and getting married and soon she’ll be gone.

I know it’s supposed to happen! And I’m really, really happy. I couldn’t have asked for a better brother-in-law than Bruce. She will be in wonderful hands and I know the road trips to wherever they are will always be fun.

But I will miss seeing her and her messy room; her crazy, just-rolled-out-of-bed hair; her laugh; borrowing her clothes or jewelry; watching Harry Potter at mom and dad’s; taking my cats to get funny hair cuts from her at the vet; and just being able to have the whole family together.

Last weekend was the weekend of engagements. And to all of my friends and acquaintances who took that step, congratulations. It’s an exciting time and I keep all of you in my prayers.

God has a reason for everything – I don’t doubt that. Change is hard, though. Especially when it involves family. Maybe once I take that step someday it will become easier to accept change.

No matter what, though, I will always daydream about having magical powers and pick shapes in the clouds.

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